I have lost…

293 medium potatoes

3.88 Teacups

1.15 15-year-old Teaspoons

776 eggs

nearly 5 car tires 

Rachael Leigh Cook

19.4 5lb bags of sugar

776 hotdogs

138.5 National Geographics

339 smart phones

 

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SO BUSY – and yet…

So, I’ve been super busy, which is good, because I don’t seem to do well when there’s downtime. Still, I’m ready for Spring Break and some planned downtime. Snowdays? Not so much. 

Anyway, the biggest update is that I went to a therapist last week. I don’t feel like it went very well. I didn’t care for her. We didn’t click. I found her hard to understand. And even though she was nice, I just didn’t feel like I could really tell her things. I’ll probably give her another chance just because I’m too chicken to call and cancel. Then again… I may not. 

She harped on me being depressed the whole time I was there. I was depressed. I was hormonal and frustrated, sad about my best friend moving, upset that I’d stalled… again. But I wasn’t there for that. That really isn’t so much of an issue. What I need it motivation to stay on track. That was something I got the feeling she didn’t know how to offer. Her suggestions weren’t good (and there weren’t really many of them) Mostly she said, “you need to figure out how to be motivated.” No kidding! Help me with that! That’s why you were recommended!

Anyway, thinking about that day and about having to go back makes me sick. I really think I need to find another place to go. Or I need to just not go at all. In some ways, I feel worse now than I did before I made the appointments. 

I am handling the depression issue better though. I have some things to look forward to that aren’t weight related. For one, I have a party this weekend. The weather has finally started warming up. I have some summer plans – the park, the pool, leaning up the yard. Probably a theme park or two now that TeaCup is a little older and I’m thin enough to ride a few things. 

And yes, I’m still absolutely down and out depressed that my friend is moving. I won’t get to see her. But I’ll probably survive. And maybe she won’t stay away that long. Hopefully. 

downtime is really, really bad for me

ANOTHER snowday. After sleeping in until after 11, all I want to do is eat. I’m not even hungry. I’m bored. 

And I’m grouchy because I’m bored and because I didn’t lose any weight. So all I want to do is eat – specifically sanwiches and tortilla chips. 

And I’m going to give in to it, because I’m bored and grouchy. Unless I find something to do soon. 

What should I do???!

 

Things I didn’t know 6 months ago

  1. It’s easier to shave your armpits… when you can see your armpits. 
  2. Same with legs
  3. Now that I can sit with my legs crossed, it’s the only comfortable way. 
  4. I have ribs, hips, knees, and knuckles. 
  5. You don’t lose weight all over – it happens first here, then there. 
  6. I have veins on the tops of my feet. 
  7. Sizes on smaller clothing varies a lot more than on larger clothing. I was a 24W consistently for years. But now, in a single trying-on session, I can wear a too-big 12 and a too small 16. 
  8. Tailbones are, quite literally, a pain in the ass. 
  9. There are so many foods I have never tried, simply because they don’t serve them at fast food places or fry them. 
  10. Pooping or not pooping can make quite a difference in your weight. 

 

I have stumbled onto something great!

Stuffed zucchini! I can’t believe I’ve never had this before. 

I found a recipe on Pinterest for cheese and bacon stuffed zucchini. Through various decisions and lack of good options, we ended up with ham and cheese (total 118 calories each). 

So, here’s all I did:

Cut the ends off 3 zucchini. Cut them in 1/2 lengthwise. 

Make some diagonal cuts to scoop out the insides. 

Cut up the insides. Mix with shredded cheese, lunch meat, some spices (I used onion spice and cayenne pepper).

Put the insides back in the zucchini.

Bake at 3:75 for 15 minutes or until everything is melty.

 

Everyone seemed to like them. The husband ate them. Teacup ate them. Teaspoon declared they were “god food” and he was going to “live for 1000 years”!

 

And I started to think. I could have ANYTHING in them!

Philly Cheese?

Tacos?

Fajitas?

Mushroom and onion and pepper?

Feta and spinach?

Cheese burger?

Sausage?

 

 

I also made quinoa patties, which deserve a little spotlight as well. They were pretty fantastic.

Quinoa, bread crumbs, an egg, shredded cheese, broccoli and cheese steamer. Cook the quinoa and steamer. Mix. Sautee. Mine made 14 at about 56 calories each. 

 

Now neither has a HUGE amount of protein, but both were really rather healthy and super yummy, so I’m satisfied!

updates

2 appointments yesterday. Here’s what I know now

  • My surgeon and nutritionist feel I’m “ahead of the game” on weight loss
  • 5-6 pounds a month for the next few months is a good goal
  • exercise every day will get me down very quickly per Dr. S
  • My goal is actually 130-140, but I’m still going to celebrate at 150.
  • I burn 1439 calories without exercise. to lose weight, I need to eat 500 fewer calories than I burn. So without exercise, I can have about 900-1000 calories. With exercise, I can have more.
  • a serving of fruit as an evening treat, along with nuts or other protein, is my new “no snacking on crap” plan
  • if I eat junk, I should limit it to 1 serving. calories count
  • 70 grams of protein still
  • recommendation from Dr S: join a class at the gym (I’m trying some zumba stuff at home while no one is looking. I miss water aerobics)
  • I am no longer having breathing troubles while I’m asleep! No apnea. I had 5 episodes an hour while on my back. Normal is 0-5. And that was 10 pounds ago!
  • in the next 3 months, my goal is to lose about 20 pounds. That will put me in the 150s!!! SO close to goal!

Next challenge: a therapy appointment next Thursday after work. I’m really not sure about/not sold on the therapist, so we’ll have to just see how it goes. I’m also nervous. Blah.

Reesee’s Cup Shake

Jay Robb Chocolate Protein Powder (Whey)

1c Skim Milk

A sprinkling of PB2

A Sprinkling of Cocoa

On the warpath

Today, I am LIVID. How exciting is that?

I’ll (maybe) come back and tell you all about it soon. For now, I’m going to teach really, really well. 

Photo Update

Image

 

It’s been awhile. I really should probably do this more often since I feel like I’m so stuck. But anyway, here’s me in August and now!

Short Tempered

I am extremely short tempered today! It started yesterday at lunch. It was like a switch flipped and all the sudden I was angry. It’s frustrating. I went ahead and took my pill this morning, even though I’ve been enjoying the lack of side effects this weekend. Hopefully that will mellow me out. 

I do have new pens today. And I should get a present from L sometime really soon. And there’s the gym today, and J is coming over tomorrow. I should have her bring her baby, so our babies can play. Teacup is walking everywhere and likes other babies. 

Okay, since my blog is primarily about my stomach, here’s what I’m eating today:

B: Hot chocolate

S: Yogurt with granola

L: BBQ chicken and spaghetti squash (leftover from Ruby Tuesday’s the other night)

S: Peas and hummus

D:?? Whatever my mother-in-law makes OR leftover salad from Friday’s yesterday. It’s not that yummy, but it’s food. 

 

Grr. For now, I’m off. I have a REALLY annoying child I need to handle. 

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