I wonder if…

There are things about having been so overweight that are very bad and scary. I’ve probably done some internal damage I can’t undo. I definitely have lumps and bumps and skin that won’t ever be the same, even after surgeries. And there’s always the chance that I’ll revert to my old habits and size.  It’s a fight forever. Maybe it’s a little like cancer that way. It’s never really gone.

BUT

I wonder if I’d never been so overweight, if I had never had bypass, if I’d never lost all that weight, how I’d feel about my size and shape. 

There are frequently threads on the OH board about the aha moment when someone says you’re thin or compares you to someone you didn’t realize you were the same size as. And it makes me wonder. I mean, if you’d always been 150 pounds and someone called you small, would you just shrug?

So, is it, in some ways, better to have this as a new thing? And will I ever forget the days I was really big? Will being a normal size ever just feel normal?

 

 

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